mrorlandosoria

Cool Hunt .LA

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mrorlandosoria

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mrorlandosoria

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@mrorlandosoria

I'm a human man who lives inside your phone and speaks to you directly. All I like talking about is guys, shopping and the mall. Whole Foods TG Meals:

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What a difference two years makes. It’s been about two years since my ex dumped me right before Thanksgiving then I got laid off my job a few months later. I’m kinda over it, but kinda not. Mainly because it felt like part of a repeating pattern of boyfriends throwing me away, a pattern I don’t have any interest in repeating. It called into question my understanding of human connection, intimacy, commitment, continuity, stability. And I’m still kinda building my own concept of what those things mean to me and how best to create meaningful connections with people who may or may not end up disappointing or hurting me. Sometimes everything seems meaningless, like we’re all just weaving in and out of each other’s lives based on proximity and convenience. Trying to figure out who you can and cannot rely on isn’t an easy task. I’m generally pretty happy now, but these thoughts and questions still run behind the smile. When I was little I always thought at some point you kinda knew all the answers and could confidently know what to do at all times. That you could easily figure out who were the best people to invite into your life. I thought my parents felt like that. But the older I get the more I realize that’s all an illusion. No one knows what they’re doing or has any idea what the right thing to do is. Life is great, but also a giant terrifying question mark. ANYWAY THAT WAS A LOT HERE’S A PHOTO OF THE TABLE WHERE I GOT DUMPED BYE. #victim #SensitiveBoysCrying #orcondo
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GUESS WHAT? I cooked an entire #Thanksgiving feast for twelve ALL BY MYSELF. Just kidding, no I didn’t. I just tricked everyone into thinking I did by pre-ordering a ready-made Thanksgiving meal from @WholeFoods and serving the whole thing on glamorous serving ware. This is definitely the holiday hack America needs right now. Instead of FREAKING OUT about getting the Thanksgiving feast on the table in time while your entire family sits there DOING ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING, why not just let someone else do it? The beautiful holiday meals from Whole Foods Market are ready to heat-and-serve. IT’S THAT EASY! I love holidays and all the food and togetherness they represent, but sometimes you just don’t have time to spend days and days prepping food for them. The high-quality, chef-inspired meals (with many organic and special diet options) let you serve a beautiful, fresh meal that will trick everyone around the dinner table into thinking you cooked them and totally know what you’re doing. EVERYBODY WINS! Check out the delicious dishes I chose to serve the Ultimate Feast for 12-14 in my stories today and order your meal online now while supplies last (link-in-profile to their super simple ordering system). It’s SUPER EASY. Okay bye! Photo @zekeruelas #sponsored #HowIThanksgiving #MakesMeWhole #WholeFoodsMarket
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I HAVE BEEN INEXPLICABLY GRUMPY AND ANNOYED ALL WEEK. I’m not quite sure why because everything is totally fine in my life. I think part of it is that I haven’t had any big projects recently, just a ton of tiny ones to work on. After the book release and the pilot planning/shooting, which together took basically the whole year, I’m just kinda coasting into next year with tons of busywork but no major exciting things (except one major thing, which I will share with you soon CAN YOU GUESS WHAT IT IS???). I think other parts of my grumpy mood came from A) the elections which reminded me there is still so much angst and conflict going on here in the USA and it seems unfixable and B) California is on fire and so many people have lost so much and it just feels like that’s now what happens every year and that’s sad and C) I went to a movie last night and realized I haven’t been to the movies since 2013 without wondering if a shooter was going to come into the theatre and shoot everyone (2013 was the year I was at the LAX shooting and was chased through an airport by a crazy person with a semiautomatic weapon and being in public spaces has never been the same since). Too bad there’s nothing we could do about that last thing like, I dunno, GUN CONTROL LIKE THE REST OF THE WHOLE WORLD HAS. So yeah, I’m in a weird mood. So here’s a moody photo of my kitchen I took for a Thanksgiving shoot I did last year. LET THIS BE A LESSON TO ALL OF US TO FOLLOW OUR MOODS WHEREVER THEY TAKE US, EVEN IF IT’S STRAIGHT TO GOTH THANKSGIVING. #victim #complainsgiving #chateaulando
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IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT! Preparing your #Thanksgiving meal doesn’t have to be an exhausting experience that leaves you frazzled and filled with rage as you pull a burning turkey out of an oven while a group of people in a nearby room yell, “IS IT SUPPERTIME YET!?”. Turns out, you can order your complete holiday meal, ready-made from @WholeFoods! I tried the Ultimate Feast for 12-14 and it was GORGEOUS. With everything from Classic Roasted Turkey to the Salt and Pepper Prime Rib Roast, the Roasted Butternut Squash, 3-Pound SHRIMP PLATTER and DELICIOUS fresh-made pies, Whole Foods Market has your holiday celebration covered. So Instead of toiling over a piping hot oven, why not cuddle up next to your family members and enjoy TOGETHERNESS? This year, I plan on being #thankful for the EASE and JOY of a ready to heat-and-serve BEAUTIFUL holiday meal from Whole Foods. It is SUPER EASY to order your meal online by going to the link-in-profile. But make sure to order now while supplies last! HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Photo @zekeruelas #sponsored #HowIThanksgiving #MakesMeWhole #WholeFoodsMarket
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Can’t believe we’re just a bit more than a week out from Thanksgiving. This year has flown by quicker than a witch flying by on a broom cackling about all the guys she has crushes on. I’ll be heading up to Casa Soria next week to scrub the floor and make charcuterie plates (my speciality) while @ormomdo yells at me about turkey and togetherness. My parents kitchen has been done for a while now and we’re finally gonna reveal the whole situation on @em_henderson and Hommemaker next week. One of the best things about the new kitchen is that multiple people can be in there cooking at the same time without being smashed together like sardines. It’s a far cry from the teeny tiny Yosemite kitchen I grew up with! Details: Appliances - @bertazzoniitalia Countertop - @cambriasurfaces (matte “White Cliff”) Backsplash - @fireclaytile “Crater Lake Hexite” Floor - @rusticotile “Clam” Island - @benjaminmoore “Olympus Green” Pattern Roman Shade - @theshadestore Faucets @kallistaplumbing Hardware - @schoolhouse Walls - @benjaminmoore “Alaskan Husky” Photo @zekeruelas #CasaSoria #ormomdokitchen #CookBeautifully #bertazzoni
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I'm continuing my dining room update with @hp and my new HP Tango printer! My goal is to take my space, which I set up as a dining room that quickly turned into a pseudo office/design studio, into something more multifunctional and beautiful. And I'm taking heed from the modern, streamlined look of this glamorous new printer to make my space practical yet fun to use. I'm printing out rug, chair, and dining table options so I can figure out which I'd like to use in my dining room. I can also snap pics on my phone as I'm shopping then print them remotely with the HP Smart App so they're all there when I get home! The HP Tango is super helpful for visual people like me who love to see furnishings next to each other before making any big decisions. Stay tuned to see how this dining room makeover evolves! #ReinventExpectations
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Spent the (post-election wind down) night at @thesurfridermalibu where @the_citizenry hosted an uberglamorous event to unveil their new line of rich linen bedding handcrafted in Portugal. The design of this cute beachy destination is really cozy and special. Basically, they took a mid-century motel and updated it to be a chic, airy resort across the PCH from the beach. I love the inventiveness of how they repurposed the space. I also the love approachable scale of the whole place. It seems like motels kinda fell out of fashion, like “motel” became a bad word. But I love seeing them revitalized, taken to new heights the way they’ve done here. This is definitely a rejuvenating place, both for local LA people to have a staycation (sorry, I hate that word but there wasn’t another one I could think of to express that idea) or for people from faraway places to haul up while in town. I’m always a fan of repurposing/updating over tearing something down to build a brand new garbagebuilding (that will be torn down in another 30 years). Kudos to @thesurfridermalibu on this beautiful renovation and @the_citizenry on their supple new bedding line. Check my stories for more on both. Okay bye. #orSPONdo #thecitizenry #thesurfridermalibu
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TODAY IS THE DAY WE CHANGE AMERICA! By voting to swap out our representatives AND voting to swap out our living room art. If you followed my stories over the weekend, you know that I nearly died due to a FREAK INTERIOR DESIGN ACCIDENT THAT COULD LITERALLY HAPPEN TO ANYONE (a giant piece of art fell on me and squashed me like a bug). Let my harrowing tale of near death be a lesson to all of us that freedom (from old art you’re tired of AND from corrupt politicians) is not easily won. Today I will take my bruised, lacerated foot and my bloody stapled head to a polling location to vote for positive change. Positive change like these new prints I got from @leftbankart on my uberglamorous buying trip to @americasmartatl. These beauties have transformed my living room into a chic, cozy space that is READY TO PARTY for the holiday season. Also, if you look closely enough you’ll see the hand-painted, limited edition pillow I created (and painted with my own hands) that goes on sale Cyber Monday (mark your calendars to make sure you’re first in line for one, I made 75 and I’M NOT MAKING ANY MORE EVER AGAIN). Okay, off to terrify poll workers with my witch-walk and my bloody Frankenstein head. GO VOTE MA’AMS AMERICA IS COUNTING ON YOU TO PUT OUT THIS DUMPSTER FIRE. Okay bye. #Chateaulando #drama #proudtobeanamerican
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A STRANGE AND MYSTERIOUS OCCURRENCE OCCURRED THIS PAST WEEKEND. A bewitched painting (not this one, which is by @aeustudio btw), fell on top of me and knocked me onto a tansu (if u don’t know what that is YOU HAVEN’T BEEN PAYING ATTENTION TO ME AND I’M FURIOUS). My head bonked on the corner of the tansu AND EXPLODED, my foot got slashed by the underside of the bed, and blood spurted everywhere like a cartoon. Thankfully, the two hunks that live downstairs (@limpitbro + @philippebowgen) ran upstairs and mopped up all my blood with fancy bath towels and took me to a hospital. Anyway I’m fine now but I learned three Important Life Lessons in my near-death experience (which you can see in my story highlights). One: Do not attempt to move paintings that are too heavy by yourself, especially if you lack basic coordination skills. Two: If you live alone you should manipulate your friends into moving downstairs so they can come save you if you have a FREAK INTERIOR DESIGN ACCIDENT THAT COULD LITERALLY HAPPEN TO ANYONE. Three: If you don’t VOTE tomorrow, a giant, heavy painting will fall on you and smash you like a pancake AND THERE WON’T BE ANY HUNKS THERE TO SAVE YOU BECAUSE YOU DON’T DESERVE HUNKS BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T VOTE. Okay bye. Photo @zekeruelas #VICTIM #VOTE #ornohunksforyou
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A few simple updates in my parents’ dining room made a world of difference. One: I replaced their rickety, too-big, non-functioning dining table with one from @rejuvenation, better scaled to the space (narrower to allow people to get out of their chairs without cutting their bodies in half on the side of the table). Two: adding MATCHING dining chairs from @serenaandlily that actually push all the way in (the old ones had arms that made them stick out, taking up precious floor space and making moving around the room difficult). Three: adding softness and texture in the beautiful wool roman shade from @theshadestore. One of the best tricks: this dining table goes from 86” to 110” and can seat 8-10 people MAKING IT SUPER HELPFUL FOR THE UPCOMING HOLIDAYS. Someday I hope I have a gay son who gives me glamorous home makeovers I don’t have to pay for. HONESTLY GONNA BE PISSED IF THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN. Okay bye. Photo @zekeruelas #CasaSoria #myonepiece #serenaandlily
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HAPPY FRIDAY IT’S TIME FOR A #FABFITFUNPARTNER MOMENT. When I found out @fabfitfun was including a glamorous Mark & Graham throw in their Winter Box, I JUST ABOUT LOST MY MIND. I’ve been a fan of both brands for ages. As the weather chills and you get ready for hibernating season, a soft, supple throw blanket is a MUST. This luscious blanket comes in neutral colors that fit with every home style. And EXCUSE ME, the throw itself is worth more than you pay for the entire FabFitFun box. The temperature outside Chateaulando has dipped below 75 degrees, so I’ll be inside, teeth chattering, hiding under this Sumptuous Seasonal Staple. AND SO CAN YOU! Head to the link-in-profile to snag your own FabFitFun Winter Box (HURRY THIS BOX IS SELLING OUT FAST!) and use code “SNUG” to get $10 off (if you don’t already subscribe). HURRY MY CHILDREN. OK BYE. #fabfitfun #chateaulando #orSPONdo
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YOU GUYS IT’S NOVEMBER! Did you just see your life flash before your eyes? It was January about six minutes ago. Today I’m headed out to this gorgeous La Habra Heights home (which is on the cover of “Get It Together!”) to shoot some VERY IMPORTANT Thanksgiving content with @zekeruelas (who also snapped this pic). It’s kind of depressing that a year just basically passed and we have like nothing to show for it. BUT DON’T BE SAD THERE IS SOMETHING TO LIVE FOR. Complainsgiving Season is now upon us! Not sure what Complainsgiving is? It’s basically the same thing as Thanksgiving but instead of expressing gratitude you just complain about stuff. Why is this good? Because hearing other people complain about stuff makes you feel better about your own life! Please complain about something in the comments! I’ll start... #Complainsgiving
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